Today is my 35th wedding anniversary. Susan, unfortunately, is in Cambridge caring for Silas this week, so we can’t be together on this auspicious day.


Here’s a picture of Susan and Silas taken this past June:


I read on the internet that the traditional gift to be exchanged on a 35th anniversary is coral. Really? I’m supposed to give my bride a marine invertebrate in class Anthozoa of phylum Cnidaria? I don’t think so! I’ll be generous and add an “h” to coral and give her something choral when she gets home on Friday.

Susan doesn’t remember this, but when we were dating – it might even have been our first Valentine’s Day as a couple – she drew a little cartoon that listed all her attributes as a partner. To divulge what these attributes were would be too personal, but I’ve never forgotten them, and I never cease to be amazed at how well she knew herself when she was just 22.

I am relieved to report that I didn’t try to reciprocate. My sense of myself when I was 24 would have made cringe-worthy reading.

So Susan entered into the state of holy matrimony feeling confident in her herself and in her partner. I entered into the state of holy matrimony in love, but with the foresight of a fruit fly – and feel that I have just plain been lucky.

Lucky in love: it doesn’t sound like much, but there are an awful lot of people who aren’t. And gratitude, it turns out, is pretty good as marriage glue.